Finding Buyers that Buy Part Two:
Unlock the Core Buying Emotion

It is unlikely that people will pay you money until you unlock their Core Buying Emotion.

How do you do that?

Today, I’m going to show you.

The trick is to understand the two critical elements that make up the Core Buying Emotion:

  1. What. You have to first understand what it is that people are after. You’ll remember that I’m not a big fan of trying to figure out their “needs.” Needs are fulfilled through the selling of commodities. You don’t really want to be in the commodity business.

    You want to be unique, exclusive, and stand out so that buyers have to get from you and none other. In this realm, you are catering to the demand that all human beings have for enjoying a better life, in one form or another.

    Unless you know what their internal demands are, you are stuck without a real business.

  2. Why. Figuring out “what” they want is not enough. It is true that you can sell some things to people knowing that, but you’ll never really create a safe, secure, consistent income this way.

    The money will begin to flow more freely when you have a clear, in-depth understanding of “why” they want those things.

The question now is this: How do you uncover their “what” and “why” so you can unlock their Core Buying Emotion?

What most businesses do is pull a meeting together of their smartest people and sit around doing their best to guess what buyers want and why they want it.

The good business owners have usually been around the block enough times … and sold enough stuff … and lost enough money … that they “get” it and know their buyers pretty well.

But, that is usually the exception. Most miss the mark either in part or completely.

The result is that they leave large amounts of profit on the table.

In some cases, they miss the mark so badly that they don’t make any profits and they go out of business.

You and I don’t want to be in that position. I think we’d rather be perfectly clear on what our buyers want and why they want it so we can make their lives better and increase our profits at the same time.

There is a better way to find the “what” and “why” than guessing.

It’s called asking.

I’m a big fan of asking buyers what they want and why they want it. It is remarkable what information you can get when you ask the right way.

The Internet makes this really, really easy. But, the way you ask is important.

As you might guess, you can’t simply send out an email saying, “Dear Buyer … Will you tell me exactly what you want in life and why you want it so I can squeeze more money out of you?”

We all know this doesn’t work.

It is like sitting around on a Friday night with some friends and asking, “What do you want to do tonight?” The answer is typically a blank stare, a shrug of the shoulders, and an “I don’t know … what do you want to do?”

But what if you asked a better question?

What if you started the conversation more like this, “Hey Tom, what is the most exciting party you ever went to?” He’ll think for a minute and start telling you all about.

Then, if you follow up that question with something like, “Why did you like the party so much?”, he is likely to talk your ear off for the next 5-10 minutes telling you why this particular party tripped his trigger.

If you are smart and listen carefully, in that description, Tom will tell you his entire internal definition of what constitutes a fun party. You can now easily identify what words, images, experiences, and emotions are important to Tom when it comes to parties.

You see, all of us have an internal formula for what’s important and valuable to us. As I said before, this is what Michael Masterson calls the Core Buying Emotion. This formula is made up of words, images, and emotions all mingled and swirled together. This formula comes out when we describe things that are important to us.

This is the key to asking your buyers what they want and why they want it. You never outright ask what they want. Instead, you get them to describe to you something that they already spent money on and why it was so important to them.

They will tell you and then you will know their internal formula for making buying decisions.

Once you know this formula, you simply mirror it back to them, with a new product attached to it. It is very likely that they will buy this new product because it resonates with their Core Buying Emotion. It shows up as important for them. The better you harmonize your offer with their Core Buying Emotion, the more likely it is that they will buy and buy often from you.

Let me tell you a quick story to illustrate the point. It’s a love story and I think you’ll enjoy it …

On Friday, February 5, 1995, I met Margie Andersen for the first time. It was a blind date that had been arranged by a mutual friend of ours — named Cherilee.

Cherilee had lived next door to me for a number of years during high school before her family moved away. But in 1993, I ran into Cherilee once again — only this time in the Netherlands, where we were both serving a mission for our Church.

Over those many years of knowing Cherilee, we had many talks about life and the future. She was great at asking quality questions and listening. I was a great talker (no surprise there). Because of this, she got to know me very well — including what I was looking for in a spouse.

When Cherilee met Margie and got to know her, bells went off in Cherilee’s head. “This gal would be perfect for Joshua!” she thought.

So, on that fateful Friday morning, she called me up and started telling me all about Margie. She knew exactly what buttons to push because she knew me so well. A blind date was set up. We went out with a large group of friends, just to be on the safe side.

Well, as it turned out, it was a marvelous experience. Lightning and fireworks were going off all night. Within a few hours of meeting each other, there was some serious strong chemistry going on and everyone we were with that night could sense it.

This story has an exciting beginning and a lovely current status …

You see, just 3 days later, I proposed to that Margie gal … and she agreed! Now, 17 years later, we have 10 wonderful children and one of the best, happiest, most rewarding marriages I’ve ever seen.

It was all made possible because Cherilee took the time to discover my Core Buying Emotion and used it as leverage to get me to take action.

She went deeper than just trying to impress me with basic benefits and features.

She asked good, quality questions that got me talking. She listened. She discovered my hot buttons. And then, she used them to my benefit.

That is what great marketers and business owners do. That is what drives profits sky-high and makes selling easy as pie.

This week, your assignment is to consider how you can use this same pattern in your business (and personal life) to unlock what your buyers want and why they want it. Here is the pattern:

  1. Ask. Ask just two quality questions that get people to openly describe something important in their life. Ask what they want and why they want it. (Obviously, it helps if it is related. If you sell cars, get them talking about their favorite car.)
  2. Listen. Listen carefully to their answers. Note the words, images, and emotions they use.
  3. Record. Take those words, images, and emotions and see how you can honestly and rationally connect them to the products and services you offer.
  4. Mirror. Mirror all of this back to them and offer to sell them something.
  5. Bank. Rejoice in the better life you helped them achieve, and deposit money in the bank. ;-)

Next week, in Part Three of this “Finding Buyers that Buy” series, I’m going to share with you the mechanics of how I talk to buyers and analyze their words, images, and emotions. It is obviously impractical to sit down one-on-one with thousands of people. But, I’ve had “conversations” with over 10,000 people at a time and made it very beneficial for all of us.

I’ll show you how next week.

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Published: March 16, 2012

2 Responses to “Finding Buyers that Buy Part Two: Unlock the Core Buying Emotion ”

  1. Joshua, your writing is exciting, persuasive. I am an experienced therapist who has learned from you already!

    Guest (Anna)


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